If Cigarette Warning Labels Came on Everything…

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To coincide with the 2012 cigarette warning labels, I’ve decided to show you what it would look like if we decided to institute this ridiculous practice with everything that’s potentially dangerous.

-Coffee  

-Gay People

 -Cars

 -Sex-Fast Food -Muggers

-Energy Supplements 

 -Politicians -Texting

 -Ke$ha -Alcohol While this may seem a tad hyperbolic to some, I’m simply illustrating my distaste for large warning labels.  I understand cigarettes are dangerous, prevalent and very accessible, however I think you’d be hard pressed to find someone who isn’t aware of their significant health risks.

From the moment you can comprehend the difference between right and wrong, it is embedded in your brain that smoking is “bad for you.”  I don’t care if you’re illiterate, blind, deaf or a graduate of the Detroit Public School system, you KNOW smoking is bad, just like you KNOW how delicious that strangers candy is going to taste.

Can we do away with the theatric political posturing and work on campaigns that will actually communicate with the public?   I mean, I know that kids always listen to everything adults tell them and  it’s much more effective to impose symbolic rules and regulations as opposed to reasoning with them on a personal level, but personally I just accept that the government can raise my children better than I can.

I know I’m not going to gather a mob of support while defending smoking, however, I’m not simply defending smoking, I’m defending the favorite ideal of conservatives: “Personal Responsibility.”

Parents are responsible for the behavior of their children.  Adults are responsible for their behavior.  If someone wants to enjoy a perfectly legal product, why is it necessary to alienate and shun their personal decisions if it doesn’t effect your life?

Currently, 20% of adults in the United States smoke cigarettes, that number will continue to decrease if you packaged cigarettes in fucking diamonds, it’s just an inevitability.

The reason I’m worried is because I fear the government will associate the loss of smokers with their new awesome labels and assume they should start using them on more products.

This might not seem like a big deal to some people, especially if you don’t smoke, but it is a big deal, it’s the first step on a very slippery slope.  I’m not one of those people creating a bomb shelter for when the government comes to steal my children and puppies, but I am an advocate for allowing people to DECIDE how they’d like to live their lives(unless of course that decision involves raping people).

I know smoking is bad for your health, he knows it’s bad for your health, YOU know it’s bad for your health…

...EV-RY-BO-DY, Knows Smoking is Bad For Your Health!

We need to let adults make their own decisions, and we need to let parents do their own parenting.  All I’m asking is why citizens of the United States need pictures when we’ve already read the book?

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Author: SpencerHayes

Biting Social Commentary and Satire.

12 thoughts on “If Cigarette Warning Labels Came on Everything…”

  1. I thought one of the other reasons for the lables was to prevent people from suing them. The rationale was that they basically tell everyone smoking will mess you up real bad, can’t sue us, we already warned you. I could be wrong though.

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  2. coffe cups a fast food establishments all have the”very hot” warnings.we all know coffe is hot but you still have idiots that sue for getting burned.

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    1. Thank you for making my point that these warnings are completely irrelevant. Does anyone ordering a hot coffee not realize their coffee is hot? It’s just like anyone purchasing a package of cigarettes knows the health risks.

      We’re adults, I just wish our government would let us act like it more often.

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  3. You could put a skull and crossbones on cigarette packs and call them Death.. Smokers would line up around the block to get them.

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